Hair Jokes

Why did the monster dye her hair yellow?

To see if blondes have more fun.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

What do you call it when a video game character gets hair on his body?

Q*berty. (my kids wrote this!)

Why does the moon have no hair?

Because it's waxing

How's my hair?

My clothes How do I look (knock, knock) He's here!!!! I'm so excited! *My pizza delivery guy.

How many hairs are in a dog's tail?

None. They are all on the outside.

What side of a monster has more hair?

The outside!

Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?

That's where you wash all your vegetables!

What do you call a smiling Roman with a hair in his teeth?

Gladiator.

Why are you so upset?

It's just hair. I'm the one that's gotta find a new girlfriend.

What do witches put on their hair?

Scare spray!

What should you buy if your hair falls out?

A good vacuum cleaner!

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

What are you talking about?

I got my hair straightened out.

Which side of a horse has the most hair?

The OUTSIDE! oh-my-goodness, that's hilarious! Skip

Why did the bully go to beauty school?

She wanted to tease hair

What's the difference between an Armenian and a Gorilla?

Just one hair.

What do you call someone who dyes their hair red?

Trans-ginger

How can I help you today, Mr Simpson?

BART: I don't know where my hair starts

What kind of hair do oceans have?

Wavy!

Why did cavemen drag their women around by the hair?

Because if they dragged them by the ankles, they'd fill up with muck.

What do you call a bear with no hair?

Bare

When my wife does our daughter's hair: "How about a double French braid swirled into a fancy bun?

When I do her hair: "How about a hat "

How does Dracula get his hair so perfect without a mirror?

Oh questions about the job No I'm good.

Why are brunettes so proud of their hair?

It matches their mustaches.

What do you call a Roman with a hair in his teeth?

Gladiator.

Why did the bald man cut a hole in his pocket?

He wanted to run his fingers through his hair.

What, why?

Is it my hair Her: no Me: MY LOOKS! Her: no, it's your personality Me: oh thank god

What do you call someone who isn't a redhead but colors there hair red later in life?

A trans-ginger

When do you kick a midget in the nuts?

When he stands next to your girlfriend and says her hair smells nice.

Why don't you ever wear your hair down?

Me: It makes me look approachable. CW: So Me: I don't want to encourage that.

How does the moon cut his hair?

Eclipse it.

Where do sheep go to get their hair cut?

The baa-baa shop.

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Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

What do Romans use to cut their pizza?

Little Caesars.

How was Rome cut in half?

With a pair of Caesars.

Blonde Dye Jokes More Blonde Dye Jokes

What's it called when a blonde dyes her hair brunette?

Artificial Intelligence.

What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brown?

Artificial intelligence What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair red Selling her soul for intelligence

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

How's the ventriloquism going?

ME: Not good. WIFE: But I got you that Ventriloquism For Dummies book. ME: I don't think he read it.

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?

50 pounds.

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

Why couldn't the melons run away and get married?

They cantelope.

What is the difference between Stephen Hawking and his E-Wheelchair?

If you repair both, the E-Wheelchair is the only thing running again

Whore Jokes More Whore Jokes

What do whores and sailors have in common?

They are both always surrounded by sea - men! I made up this one.

How are whores and movies alike?

You pay up front for both and even if it's bad, you don't get a refund for either.

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

How can you tell if you're in Detroit or across the river in Windsor Ontario Canada?

Stand in the middle of the street. If someone yells, "hey, get out of the street" you're in the US. If they yell, "get out of the street, eh" you're in Canada

What does the 'H' in Jesus 'H' Christ stand for?

Haploid

Daughter Hair Jokes More Daughter Hair Jokes

Why couldn't the quadrilateral comb out her daughters hair?

Because it was a wrecked tangle

When my wife does our daughter's hair: "How about a double French braid swirled into a fancy bun?

When I do her hair: "How about a hat "

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

What's your favorite medical joke?

I've memorized a lot of jokes from a previous "doctor joke" thread, and need some fresh material!

What do you call someone who makes a lot of money through deforestation of the Amazon?

A Brazillionaire!