Pronounce Jokes

Why is it so hard to pronounce words in Welsh?

It is the language of Wales.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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How can you determine which of two people is a chemist and which is a plumber?

You ask them to pronounce unionize.

How do you tell the difference between a Fabric Designer and a Science Professor?

Ask them to pronounce "LATEX"

Why isn't there democracy in North Korea?

Because everytime they try to pronounce "election" everyone starts to giggle

How do you tell the difference between an electrician and an electrical engineer?

Ask them to pronounce the word, "unionized".

What's the difference between a plumber and a scientist?

Pronounce this word: unionized

Why are there exactly two hundred and thirty nine beans in an Irish Bean Soup?

Because if there were one more, it'd be two forty. (Too farty) This works much better when spoken out loud. The joke how Irish people pronounce "forty."

What's a pirate's favorite workout program?

Pirates (pronounced like pilates)

What's the proper way to pronounce Mormon?

The second m is silent.

What are Mario's overalls made of?

Denim denim denim (pronounced with the Mario underground theme)

What did the hippy say when he was told to get off the couch and get a job?

Namaste (pronounced:nah I'ma stay)

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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When it's a legal matter, it's pronounced o-FENCE. When it's sports, it's pronounced OFF-ence. Climbing...?

A fence.

Why did Steve Harvey announce Miss Colombia as the Miss Universe winner?

Because he couldn't pronounce Miss Philippines.

How can you tell if a person works in HR or IT?

Ask them to pronounce the following: **HIRES**

What do you call a Pho restaurant run by 9 Japanese chefs?

Pho Kyuu EDIT: No one understands how to pronounce "Pho".;;

What do you call cantaloupe flavored gum?

A Ty-lemma (pronounced like dilemma)

Why's the ch pronounced differently in orchid than in orchard?

ROBOT: twitch, spark

What is your reason for divorce?

She pronounces 'Kansas' like the second part of 'Arkansas'

What's the difference between a Chemist and a Plumber?

The way they pronounce "unionized"

How do you pronounce the capital of Kentucky, Loo-e-ville or Loo-is-ville?

I pronounce it Frankfort.

How do you pronounce "nihilism?

It doesn't matter

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Why isn't the word gangster pronounced Jang-ster?

Because there ain't no such thing as a soft 'G.'

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Unionize Jokes More Unionize Jokes

How do you tell a chemist from a non-chemist?

Ask them to pronounce 'unionized.'

How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask them to say the word, "unionized".

Beer Jokes More Beer Jokes

Why are bunnies so good at brewing?

Cause beer is made with hops.

Why did the man with an electric car think he had a dual exhaust?

He drank a lot of beer. He ate a lot of beans. *You love it.*

Chemist Jokes More Chemist Jokes

How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce unionized.

What did the chemist say when hr found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Why all Pascal programmers ask to live in Atlantis?

Because it is below C level.

What do you get when you mix Fascism and Communism?

I don't know, that's why I was asking you.

Fence Jokes More Fence Jokes

Why are Redditors so good at fencing?

Because they always riposte.

Why do cemeteries have fences around them?

Because people are dying to get in.

Language Jokes More Language Jokes

What language does robot Marco run on?

Rubio on rails

How to make your God proud?

By abusing his names in other languages.

Kentucky Jokes More Kentucky Jokes

How can you tell that the toothbrush was invented in Kentucky?

Because it is not called a teethbrush.

How do you pronounce the capital of Kentucky, Loo-e-ville or Loo-is-ville?

I pronounce it Frankfort.

Capital Jokes More Capital Jokes

What are a Corporation's Favourite Letters?

Capital I's

What's the capital of Ohio?

Son: ... Me: It's also a famous explorer. Son: Dora Me: Yep. Dora, Ohio.