Government Jokes

What do you call the 'n' in government?

CryptoN Only few will get this

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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What do you call a snake that works in the government?

A civil serpent

Why is the oval office oval shaped?

Because the government cuts corners.

What type of government would a nation ran by Alvin and the Chipmunks be called?

A theocracy.

How do you stop the government from making a pipeline across your land?

You Sioux them.

What do you call a group of spoiled children?

The government

What do you call a chicken takeover of the government?

A coop.

Why do you call the US government when a blizzard of secret information gets released?

They're snowed-en!

Why did the Chinese Government cross the road?

THE PUNCHLINE OF THIS JOKE HAS BEEN CENSORED BY THE GOVERNMENT OF THE PEOPLES REPUBLIC OF CHINA, PLEASE REMAIN CALM WHILE WE WILL DEAL WITH THE OP IN A CIVIL MANNER.

Why does government matter?

It doesn't.

What functions worse than the US Government?

A Greek Bank.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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What do you call a spider that wants to overthrow the government?

An anarchid.

What did the guitars do when they were unhappy with their government?

Formed a coustic d'tat

What do you call a government consisted of burglars?

A thiefdom.

What does the US Government use to spy on a high school student?

An essay.

What's the difference between organized crime and the government?

Only one of them is organized. Couldn't help but post this. Went to see a former mafia boss today, and that joke was told leading up to him speaking.

What kind of government does Disney World have?

A plutocracy

How many governments does it take to make an Egyptian happy?

I'll let you know when I find out...

What do banks and the US government have in common?

They both deal with checks and balances.

What do you call a fish who works for the government?

An Official.

What's the difference between the government and the Mafia?

One of them is organized.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What if the Government invented cheese to distract us from reality?

Gets arrested*

Why are families only allowed 1 child in China?

The government is opposed to euthanasia.

How do the Russian people feel about their government?

They're Putin up with it.

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Censor Jokes More Censor Jokes

Why did the Chinese Government cross the road?

THE PUNCHLINE OF THIS JOKE HAS BEEN CENSORED BY THE GOVERNMENT OF THE PEOPLES REPUBLIC OF CHINA, PLEASE REMAIN CALM WHILE WE WILL DEAL WITH THE OP IN A CIVIL MANNER.

What do Russians use to censor websites?

The Inter-nyet.

Type Jokes More Type Jokes

Why is it hard for Chihuahuas to type on a keyboard?

They're all paws.

What type of tree hates company?

Sycamore trees!

Road Jokes More Road Jokes

Why did the dog cross the road?

Because it was the chickens day off.

Why did the man with one hand cross the road?

To get to the second-hand shop.

Nation Jokes More Nation Jokes

What do you call a nation of programmers?

A developing country

How much of the First Nations vote did Stephen Harper get?

Nunavut.

' Jokes More ' Jokes

Why did the Irish Football manager flood the pitch?

So he could bring his 'sub' on

What did the tooth say to the dentist?

Fill 'er up!

Chinese Government Jokes More Chinese Government Jokes

Why did the Chinese Government cross the road?

THE PUNCHLINE OF THIS JOKE HAS BEEN CENSORED BY THE GOVERNMENT OF THE PEOPLES REPUBLIC OF CHINA, PLEASE REMAIN CALM WHILE WE WILL DEAL WITH THE OP IN A CIVIL MANNER.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get when you cross a Sith Lord, and a Donkey?

Darth Mule! A joke, from third grade me... Happy Star Wars day!

What do you get if you cross teeth with candy?

Dental floss!

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What do you do if your bank account stops working?

Throw the guy out of the house.

How do you stop bad singing?

A pitchfork