DUUUUUuU
Not march.
Santa stops at 3 Ho's (sorry if it's a re-post)
A Leek!
One's really fun to smash with a sledge-hammer and the other is just a watermelon
Cuz if it were lying down it wouldnt make any sense. (first post to reddit, made up this joke today.. be kind)
Two test tickles.
The unemployment line.
Womb tempertaure
The ultra-sound guy. Who takes over when hes on holiday? The hip-replacement guy
Racism has many faces
I don't know but i think i just got a raging clue
All the pairs of floating eyes
It taint yours and it taint mine :D (Puns for the win :D)
Your teeth!
They're not infallible
Depends.
FB=Whats on your mind FourSquare= Where am I Quora=what Youtube=What Im watching. LinkedIn=Whats in it for me
I dunno, i just click submit
It's counterproductive
Anyone can tuna piano, but nobody can piano a tuna!
Dis-knee channel.
Me:Onion prices. S:You know what I mean,like What's crackin' M:Nutshells. S:Really Fine.What's poppin M:Corn. *Blocked*
Crows! they're the undisputed kings of CAW-Medy
P p
Nothing, hes a fan.
You take the "S" out of "Sub", and then you take the "F" out of "Way".
Yoda lady. Yoda lady who Good job yodeling! 2.Knock knock. Whos there Well, not your parents, because your parents never knock!
Kristall nacht
Mine is: I'll give you candy if you get in the van
Both accused of treason for expressing their freedom but Zoidburg didn't get his marshmallows!
Gopher' it.
Not Jack's.
Ellen Pao Oh k lol stay out.
Yahoo!
I can get through his opening monologue without laughing
Because theres so many wings and wongs you wing the wong number.
Your uncle.
Gomer's Pile
Red paint! Whats green, and smells like red paint Green paint :) Can't believe how many time I switch to the second, and they don't get it!
A Cheetah.
It's like a French kiss, but down under.
Super Pickle
Livin' on a fare!
A brick
One foots both the same!
Australia.
The ultra sound guy. And who covers when hes off sick The hip replacement guy.
By removing the S
I wouldn't pay 200 to have a lentil on in my mouth
The hip replacement guy. /dad
He has no arms. knock knock. Whos there Not billy
OMG my neighbours cat is stuck on the roof-" 911: Ma'am, this is an emergency only service- "-of my sons mouth."
A gun actually does something when triggered.
HER: I'll have the s- ME: WHO THE HELL IS THIS GUY!
A nun in a car accident.
A Nepal.....
Parachute
Because there's always Whos there!
Babies
Zoocchini
Its on the tip of my tongue...
A satisfactory.
Mohammed Ali opening a can of coke.
Your Sherlock Homie
A Hand!
A toad he croaks if you even touch him!
A fridge with a denim jacket on. HA!
Well actu.." "Hes cute" *pets it* "Sir thats my.." *picks it up* "Your a good dog arent you " "PUT MY SON DOWN"
Bill front (Money jokes i got em)
Allahwho akbar
I don't know.
The same
Spitting swallowing and gargling.
They never let you finish first. (#s)
Toast is brown on both sides.
D(sun)/dt *facepalm*
A bomb vest does something when triggered.
Two pies to the face and one somewhere in a field in Pennsylvania.
Getting the wheelchair in the oven.
3 hours, but it takes 1 day for it to get to Hot
Dr.Dre
Shes awesome!". Because I knew she was trouble when she walked in.
Reach For The **Stats**.
Oh wait thats Nicki Minaj. Why would an alien in a wig pick Nicki Minaj as a name
The dishes if she knows whats good for her.
36 -Thats not even close!! -But it was quick.
A tractor
AlgeBRUH!
The SWAT team
The pirate replied, "Arrg it's driving me nuts!"
One's mad cow disease the other's an agricultural problem.
The Christmas alphabet has Noel.
Sharks in Malaysia
Half to none of the time.
Aren't all cats pure evil
You never get tired of seeing them again & again...
It's croak-et!
Common sense
