You take the "S" out of safe and the "F" out of way. One of my all time faves. If you say it out loud it will make sense
Having legs.....
Ebola cereal!
On less person is drunk
The man on the moon? Santa Claus? Or an honest Lawyer? Yes you got it Santa. The other two are figments of the imagination.
It only takes 1 nail to hang the painting.
You take the S out of SAFE and you take the F out of WAY
If you like dialogue, theres a whole lot of Tolkein.
It says "Hey Shrek, whats up?" (I was 9 when i made this okay)
Yoghurt has a culture.
You take the letter "S" out of "sub", and the letter "F" out of "way".
When i was younger, i used to drink any brand of beer, but now i am older Budweiser
Everyone can roast beef
Twitter only allows 160 characters
Kermit the frogs finger.
Introverted Engineer looks at His shoes when he's talking to you. Extroverted Engineer looks at Your shoes when he's talking to you.
Seeder
The taste.
Stephen Hawking's
British dentist.
Kermit the frogs middle finger.
Under his buccan-hat.
The Middle. That way, you're always driving out of Iowa.
Two test-tickles.
Cross-Crountry
Having crabs on yer organ!
Spit, sallow, and gargle.
Nothing, because either way, someone is losing their trailer.
When I drop a load in the washing machine it doesn't follow me around for a week.
I'm Canadian and i was just wondering
You take the "S" out of sub, and the "F" out of way. Say it out loud
A park bench can support a family of four.
A calendar has dates.
One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer and the other one is a watermelon
Only two more sleeps until Christmas.
Mick Jagger sings eh you, get offa mai cloud, but the Scottish farmer says eh McLeod, get offa mai ewe!
The engine stops whining after the plane lands.
DUUUUUuU
Santa stops at 3 Ho's (sorry if it's a re-post)
A Leek!
One's really fun to smash with a sledge-hammer and the other is just a watermelon
Cuz if it were lying down it wouldnt make any sense. (first post to reddit, made up this joke today.. be kind)
Two test tickles.
The unemployment line.
Womb tempertaure
The ultra-sound guy. Who takes over when hes on holiday? The hip-replacement guy
Racism has many faces
It taint yours and it taint mine :D (Puns for the win :D)
Your teeth!
They're not infallible
Depends.
FB=Whats on your mind FourSquare= Where am I Quora=what Youtube=What Im watching. LinkedIn=Whats in it for me
I dunno, i just click submit
It's counterproductive
Anyone can tuna piano, but nobody can piano a tuna!
Dis-knee channel.
No one ever paid $50 to have a Lentil on their face.
Crows! they're the undisputed kings of CAW-Medy
Nothing, hes a fan.
You take the "S" out of "Sub", and then you take the "F" out of "Way".
Gopher' it.
Not Jack's.
Yahoo!
I can get through his opening monologue without laughing
Because theres so many wings and wongs you wing the wong number.
Your uncle.
Gomer's Pile
Red paint! Whats green, and smells like red paint Green paint :) Can't believe how many time I switch to the second, and they don't get it!
A Cheetah.
Dad.
It's like a French kiss, but down under.
Super Pickle
Attire.
Livin' on a fare!
A brick
One foots both the same!
Australia.
The ultra sound guy. And who covers when hes off sick The hip replacement guy.
The line at KFC
By removing the S
I wouldn't pay 200 to have a lentil on in my mouth
The hip replacement guy. /dad
Its arse.
A Nepal.....
Because there's always Whos there!
Zoocchini
A satisfactory.
Your Sherlock Homie
A Hand!
A toad he croaks if you even touch him!
A fridge with a denim jacket on. HA!
Bill front (Money jokes i got em)
Two towers.
I don't know.
The same
Spitting swallowing and gargling.
Toast is brown on both sides.
D(sun)/dt *facepalm*
A bomb vest does something when triggered.
