Town Jokes

How do cows go from one town to another?

They cowmmute.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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What does Stalin do on a night out?

Paints the town red

What do you call a town in the middle of the Arctic Ocean?

An Iceburgh.

Where do all the bad hamburger buns live?

In the seedy part of town

What town in the continental United States produces the most alligator pears per year?

Avo, CA does.

What do you call it when all the Chinese places in town start to close?

Wonton endangerment.

What did the farmer say when the townspeople told him all of his cows were in town..?

I herd.

Why was the actor detained by airport security?

He said he was in town to shoot a pilot.

How can you ever be late for anything in London?

They have a huge clock right in the middle of the town.

What do communists do on May Day?

Paint the town red.

What do you call a group of people in charge of renewable energy for a town?

A solar panel.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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Who's there! Arizona! Arizona who?

Arizona room for one of us in this town!

How do zombies celebrate Halloween?

They paint the town dead!

What did the farmer say when he heard the town gossiping about his cornfield fire?

My ears are burning!

Why did the pop punk chicken cross the road?

To get out of this town.

Where'd you get that black eye?

Me: My girlfriend gave it to me. Him: I thought your girlfriend was out of town. Me: I did too...

What do you call an empty town after dinner?

Desserted

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Blow Jokes More Blow Jokes

What is the difference between a drunk driver and a high driver?

The drunk driver will blow through a stop sign without even knowing it was there.. The high driver will wait until it turns green

What did the blonde say when someone blew in her ear?

Thanks for the refill.

Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

Why did the hipster burn their tongue?

They ate their dinner before it was cool.

Why can you never get caught with a 0 in math?

Because cot(0) doesn't exist... This joke... it burns my eyes...

Asian Jokes More Asian Jokes

What does an Asian chicken sound like?

Bok Bok Bok CHOY

How does the Asian chef get to work?

He woks.

Course Jokes More Course Jokes

What's the difference between golf and Lady Godiva?

One is a hunt on a course.

What do you do if you are driving your car in central Manhattan and you see a space man?

Park in it, of course.

Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

What's worse than getting rejected by an attractive stranger?

Getting hit on by an ugly stranger.

Why was the baseball player arrested?

He was involved in a hit-and-run.

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons?

Hose A and Hose B

What did the Mexican say when the house fell on him?

Ayyyy watch it homes!

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Why shouldn't you buy Ukrainian underpants?

Cos Chernobyl fall out

What do you call a mushroom that goes into a bar and buys everyone a drink?

The fun guy

Christmas Eve Jokes More Christmas Eve Jokes

What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve?

Black mail!

What did Adam say to Eve on the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve.