Cricket neck means I can't lift anything!
They really look like adults, especially the 20-years old
Me: A bowl of Oreos. CW: Lol you mean Cherrios Me: No.
You're not a bartender! You're just a pharmacist.
Because it means they *cantaloupe*
Me: The bus mostly Interviewer: I mean what motivates you to get out of bed in the morning M: missing the bus
Pupil: Up and down or across Teacher: What do you mean Pupil: Well up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0!
I answer back... You mean in bed
Careful, you might be getting screwed.
IPhone. - No, I meant the number. - It's a 6. - No, to contact you. - I don't use it for that.
She said, "Whatever means necessary." "No it doesn't," I said.
Jesus: I can varnish 'You mean vanish ' J: *running finger over a beautiful oak table* aha, not quite
They mean what they say.
Daughter: Well the principal kept going on about the school spirit.
Making people guess the meaning of acronyms.
Some poor horse is walking around in his socks.
The teacher was rather bewildered. "Don't you mean Michael " she asked. "No ma'am. I've written the 'M' already."
Sherlock replied, "Alimentary, my dear Watson."
Pupil: Fire Earth Water and the Internet. Teacher: What do you mean the Internet Pupil: Well Mum says that whenever I'm on the Net I'm in my element.
Him: The fact that you're calling ingredients tools means u shouldnt be in charge of this.
It's the car most sales representatives drive.
Student Funny, I was just going to ask you that.
Me: Job. Interviewer: I mean what do you want from this job Me: Salary
Theft
What I mean: "I'm off to smoke a bowl in my car so I can deal with all of you."
I mean let me see your license
Husband: Same as Jesus.. Wife: What do you mean Husband:I will disappear on Friday and reappear on Monday!!
Aunt Arctica! PENGUIN.. ME makes flies over head motion PENGUIN I don't know what that means
I already changed my Facebook relationship status for you.
Because Love means nothing to them.
What do you mean you only brought two ants!
Liberty
Gamble in British currency.
Oh yeah. Imagination.
Leave the dungeon door unlocked.
Because she didn't like his lack of commitment
He liked chillin.
Shall we walk home or take a dog
He walked into a bar.
None, its already lit fam. I cannot take credit for this due to being told this joke by a freind. He was in fact lit af.
Hella
ME glaring at Cheryl, who took the last donut: idk, maybe don't hire Cheryl
Idk...
Bison
Dad says: "You are my son, I'm confident about that. Your friend over there, is also my son, THAT is confidential."
