France Jokes

What could have been the most stuppidest result of Napolleonic wars if France won?

Tsar Napoleon.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

$19.99

What's a barista in France's favorite workout?

A French press

How do you know the toothbrush was made in France?

Anywhere else it would've been the "teethbrush"

What do you get when you throw a grenade into a kitchen in France?

Linoleum blown apart

What do you get when you cross France and Britain?

Canada.

Why should you never order the eggs while in France?

Because they are always uf.

Who is the most famous cow in France?

Albert Camoo

Why do the French make omelettes with only one egg?

Because in France one egg is un oeuf.

Why is their always lightning in France?

Obviously, since lightning takes the path of least resistance.

What do they call Miley Cyrus in France?

Kilometrey Cyrus.

What do they call the Hunger Games in France?

Battle Royale with Cheese.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

$19.99

Why do most French recipes require only one egg?

In France, one egg is *un oeuf*

How do you know if you've fallen in love with an apple from France?

Your heart goes "pomme pomme... pomme pomme..."

What is the bounciest place in France?

The dordogne.

What did France say to Turkey?

That's not nice.

Who ruled France until he exploded?

Napoleon Blownapart!

How many eggs do the French use in their omelettes?

Just one, because in France one egg is un oeuf.

Why do you only need one egg in France?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

How do we know that Joan of Arc was French?

She was maid in France!

What is a Pokemon's favourite place to go in France?

Paras

Where do you find 60 million French jokes?

In France.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

$19.99

What do you get when you throw a hand grenade into a bathroom in France?

Linoleum Blownapart

What's the difference between a jar of mayonnaise and France?

If you leave the jar alone for 200 years it'll develop a culture.

Why are the streets of France lined with trees?

So the Germans can march in the shade.

What do they call Independence Day in France?

A Royale-free with cheese! (Happy Bastille Day(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BastilleDay)!)

What street in France do reindeer live on?

Rue Dolph

Did you know the first French fries weren't cooked in France?

They were cooked in Greece

Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France?

There was nothing left but de Brie.

You might also enjoy:

Italy Jokes More Italy Jokes

What do you call a sketchy place in Italy?

The "spaghetto"

What's the difference between Italy and a tea bag?

Ones in a cup

Tsar Jokes More Tsar Jokes

Why did the dyslexic, Russian astronomer hate the revolution?

He was following the Tsar.

What could have been the most stuppidest result of Napolleonic wars if France won?

Tsar Napoleon.

3 Day Jokes More 3 Day Jokes

What did Abraham Lincoln say after recovering from a 3-day drinking binge?

I set* ***who*** *free "*

Why does Jesus not play video games?

Everytime he dies he has to wait 3 days to respawn

French Press Jokes More French Press Jokes

Why do ISIS fighters only drink instant coffee?

Because they hate the French Press. (This joke used to be more topical)

Why does ISIS drink instant coffee?

Because they hate French press!

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What do you call a spy that likes to spend time with his son?

James Bonding bah dun tss

Why is a viola solo like a bomb?

By the time you hear it, it's too late to do anything about it.

Kitchen Jokes More Kitchen Jokes

What was the pig doing in the kitchen?

Bacon! Get it?

What does a know-it-all always have in their kitchen?

A pedantry.

1940 Jokes More 1940 Jokes

Who won the Tour de France in 1940?

The Sixth German Panzer Division

Charlie Sheen Jokes More Charlie Sheen Jokes

What's Charlie Sheens middle name?

Washingma Charlie Washingma Sheen

What did Charlie Sheen say when he won the Tour de France?

Schwinning!