Arm Jokes

Because he said he only loved her this much (hold out t-rex like arms) Sorry this one requires a bit of a visual, but I thought you guys might like it

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the ocean?

Bob

Why did little Johnny fall off the swing?

He didn't have arms. Why did little Sarah fall off her bike Someone threw a fridge at her.

What has six legs two arms four eyes and a tail?

A man holding an aardvark.

What do you call 222,215 Frenchman with their arms up?

The active French armed forces.

What do you call 5 guys who have no arms or legs and a woman floating in the water together?

Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob and Ann

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in a lake?

Bob

Why were all the ladies attracted to Jesus?

Because he was hung like this. (Hold your arms out wide)

Why is horse racing so romantic?

Because the horse hugs the rails the jockey puts his arms around the horse and you can kiss your money goodbye!

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs at your front door?

Matt

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in water?

Bob

What did the boy with no arms &amp legs get at the World Cup?

Cancer. ()

What is the fastest way to get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?

A. Wave at her.

Who's there! Butch! Butch who?

Butch your arms around me!

Why did little Suzy fall of the swing set?

She has no arms... Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch?

Names.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who's trying to get home?

A taxi

Why do all the ladies love Jesus?

Spreads out arms to fullest length) Because he was hung like this.

What kind of tea do you pay an arm and a leg for?

Amputee

How much does a red lightsaber cost?

An arm and a leg edit: slightly improved punchline

How do you know the Statue of Liberty isn't French?

It doesn't have both arms raised. And yes I know the French manufactured the Statue of Liberty and gave it to the United States

What did the child with no arms get for Christmas?

Gloves. Just kidding, he hasn't opened it yet.

Why did Lucy fall off the monkey bars?

She's got no arms Me: Knock Knock Them: Whose there Me: Not Lucy.

What does a Soldier and a Shoulder have in common?

They have access to arms.

What does an octopus wear on a cold day?

A coat of arms!

When I see a "How am I driving?

Sticker, I want to take the driver in my arms and tell them that I too have questions about my existence

What do you call a man with no arms or legs who likes to go swimming?

Bob.

Why did Timmy fall off the swing?

Me: why Him: Timmy has no arms. Knock knock. Me: Who's there Him: Not Timmy.

Why did Sally fall of the swingset?

She had no arms. BONUS JOKE: Knock Knock. Who's there Not Sally.

What's the difference between an expensive purchase and a loud noise that scares a chicken?

One costs an arm and a leg. The other caused alarm and an egg.

What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas?

I dont know, hes still trying to kick it open.

What do you call a man with three arms and a pegleg?

I have no idea because the actual joke is always in the comments.

What do you call a child with no arms and no legs swimming in a pool?

Bob.

What do you call a pirate with two legs, two arms and two eyes?

Noob.

What did the Russian soldier say when he held his newborn sibling in his hands for the first time?

You're my brother in arms!

Why did the football player laugh when he broke his arm?

Because it was humerus.

Why couldn't Harry play basketball?

Because he's got no arms.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pile of leafs?

Russel

What has eight arms and tells the time?

A clocktopus Shoutout to the popper from my Xmas dinner

What do you call a kid with no arms and legs playing baseball?

2nd base.

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What is brown and has got four legs and an arm?

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs lying under a pile of leaves?

What do you call someone with no arms and no legs being towed behind your boat?

What famous actor costs an arm &amp a leg to hire?

Why is Def leppard the best band to listen to while driving?

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas?

What do you do when you stumble upon a one-armed Polish man stuck in a tree?

Why cant billy ride the swings?

When birds fly in a 'V' formation, one arm of the V is usually longer than the other. Do you know why that is?

Why do people wear sleeveless shirts?

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs?

Your Age Is Only Math

Why couldn't Susie ride the swings?

How long are your arms?

What do you call a man with no arms or legs...... sitting at your door?

What has four legs and an arm?

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in a high school?

What has two arms and 14 legs?

What do you call a man with no arms &amp no legs......hanging on the wall?

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves?

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in your swimming pool?

Why can't Sally ride the swings?

Love

Which wizard can help you tone up your arms and upper body?

What has 4 legs and an arm?

What do you cal a man with no arms and no legs fighting with his cat?

What happened to the Arm &amp?

What do you do with percussionists that lose one of their drumsticks?

What did people call Putin after he lost an arm?

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, who hangs out in your pool?

What has got four legs and an arm?

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool?

What do you call a kid with no arms or legs at the front door?

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

What do you call a man without arms or legs who gets into a fight with his cat?

What do you call a person who is missing his left eye, left ear, left arm and left leg?

Why did the T-Rex's girlfriend leave him?