Snowden Jokes

What does a whistle-blower do during a Russian blizzard?

Nothing, he's Snowden.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Why does the NSA hate winter?

Because they're not used to getting Snowden.

Why did Edward miss his flight out of Russia?

Because he was Snowden.

Why couldn't the whistleblower pick up his dry-cleaning?

Because he was Snowden! (Snowed in)

Why is Edward still in Russia?

He's Snowden.

Why is Edward Snowden still in Russia?

The airport is Snowden

Why could Edward not leave his driveway and get back to his home country?

He was Snowden.

Why can't Russia extradite US top-secret whistle-blowers?

Because they're Snowden (snowed-in). To all the folks on the East coast, stay safe and warm.

Why couldn't the NSA go outside?

They were Snowden.

Why couldn't the NSA agent leave his house this Winter?

He was Snowden.

Why was Edward stuck at the Russian airport?

Because he was Snowden.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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Why didn't Edward leave his house?

Because he was Snowden.

What did the whistleblower say after the blizzard in Russia?

I'm Snowden!

Why was it easier for the whistleblower to leave American soil earlier in the year?

It didn't Snowden.

Why couldn't the NSA do anything after the blizzard?

Because they were Snowden.

Why couldn't Edward leave Russia?

Because he was Snowden.

Why couldn't Edward leave the Airport?

Because he was Snowden...

Why was the whistleblower late for his annual winter whistleblower's convention?

Because he was Snowden!

Why couldn't the whistleblower leave his house?

Because he was Snowden

Whats the difference between Zoidburg and Snowden?

Both accused of treason for expressing their freedom but Zoidburg didn't get his marshmallows!

Why can't Edward leave Russia this winter?

He'll be Snowden.

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Why does Edward never leave Russia?

He's always Snowden.

Why can't Edward leave Russia?

He's Snowden.

Why couldn't the man leave Moscow?

He was Snowden.

Why couldn't the whistleblower step outside?

Because it's Snowden.

What did the NSA say to Russia after the blizzard?

We're Snowden!

Why couldn't the NSA leave their houses?

They got Snowden.

Why was the NSA computer programmer late for work?

Because he got Snowden

Why didn't Russia return the NSA whistleblower to the United States?

He was Snowden.

Why couldn't the NSA agent leave the Russian airport?

Because he got Snowden!

Why couldn't the ex-CIA agent leave Russia?

Because he was Snowden

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Flight Jokes More Flight Jokes

Why did the flight from Warsaw to Moscow crash?

There were Poles on the right half of the plane.

Why did the vulture get kicked off the flight?

He brought the wrong carrion.

East Coast Jokes More East Coast Jokes

What do Hurricane Irene and Kim Kardashian have in common?

They blow the whole east coast and there's videos online.

Why can't Russia extradite US top-secret whistle-blowers?

Because they're Snowden (snowed-in). To all the folks on the East coast, stay safe and warm.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

How does a chef ask to leave the dinner table?

He says, "Gourmet I be excused?"

What did the right testlcle say to the left?

Look at this guy in the middle trying to act all hard

Nsa Jokes More Nsa Jokes

What did the NSA agent say when the blizzard hit?

Looks like we're snowed in.

Why can't the NSA leaker leave Russia?

Because he's Snow'd-in!

Year Jokes More Year Jokes

How many seconds are in a year?

12. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd.... etc

What do you call a book club that's been stuck on the same book for thousands of years?

Church.

Blizzard Jokes More Blizzard Jokes

What do you call a Canadian in a blizzard?

Cold.

How do you find Will Smith in a blizzard?

Look for fresh prince

Stick Jokes More Stick Jokes

What is the most faithful insect?

A flea once they find someone they like they stick to them!

Who is the brother of Juan Luna?

Edi si AnTWOnio Luna. Yeah yeah, the result of being stuck in the traffic.

Nsa Agent Jokes More Nsa Agent Jokes

Why couldn't the NSA agent leave the Russian airport?

Because he got Snowden!

Why couldn't the NSA agent leave his house this Winter?

He was Snowden.