Greet Jokes

How do Soviet prison mates greet each other?

Gulag to you too.

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How does a French soldier greet his comrades?

Salut!

How does a Redditor greet a woman from Kuala Lumpur?

M'alaydy

How do two psychiatrists greet each other?

You are fine, how am I?

How do you greet the cold horse across the fence?

Howdy Neigh - Brr Made up by my 4 year old son.

Who you must not greet on a plane?

HI Jack!

How do you greet a Rastafarian who's out of work?

Jahbless

How do two lawyers greet each other?

With a firm handshake.

How does a French alcoholic greet someone?

Enchantr.

How does a Facebook employee greet each other?

Hey there, whatsapp!!

How do Israeli skiiers greet each other?

Shlalom! (Oy, that's terrible.)

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How do German bread greet each other?

Gluten tag!

How do genetically engineered car salesmen from Boston greet their customers?

Hey, gattaca? GATTACA?

How did Maxwell greet Ampre?

Good Faraday to you, sir!

How does a frog greet a rabbit during the holiday season?

Hoppy holidays, and have a hoppin New Hare! Happy holidays everyone.

How did the Mexican greet people in Hawaii?

Ahola.

How do skeletons greet each other?

Bon'nichiwa

How do sheep greet each other at Christmas?

A Merry Christmas to ewe

How do you greet a slice of bread in Germany?

Gluten tag! Ba-dum tss.

What does an excited karate pupil say to his friend when greeting him?

HIYAH!

How does a viola greet a relative?

Cello!

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How do you greet a British programmer named Cathryn?

Allo-cate

How do angels greet each other?

They say Halo.

How does a pirate greet a sea monster?

What's Kraken

How does gravity greet itself?

It just waves

What would you like to Instagram?

How waiters should greet people

How did one gold atom greet the other gold atom?

Ey you.

What is the farmers favorite way to greet someone?

Hay!

How do you greet a German baker?

Gluten Tag

How do you greet people at a funeral?

Mourning, everybody!

How do Hawaiian Muslims greet each other?

Aloha Akbar!

What did the German baker say to greet his customers?

Gluten tag!

How do French poodles greet each other?

Bone-jour.

How to cats greet each other at Christmas?

A furry Merry Christmas & Happy mew year"!

How did Maxwell greet Ampere?

Good Faraday to you, sir!

How do nudists greet each other?

With a bare hug.

How do you greet a three-headed monster?

Hi, hi, hi.

How do salespeople traditionally greet each other?

Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm better than you.

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Rastafarian Jokes More Rastafarian Jokes

How do you greet a Rastafarian who's out of work?

Jahbless

What did the Rastafarian say to his lady friend?

Jamaican me crazy!!

Israeli Jokes More Israeli Jokes

How does Moses make his tea?

Hebrews it. I'm serious! That Israeli how he does it!

How do Israeli skiiers greet each other?

Shlalom! (Oy, that's terrible.)

Plane Jokes More Plane Jokes

Why did the pilot crash the plane?

Because he was a slice of bread

Why Couldn't the Ancient Egyptians Build a Plane?

Because, it wasn't very Pharoah-dynamic.

Pothead Jokes More Pothead Jokes

How did the pothead propose to his girlfriend?

Marriage.. you wanna?

What do you call a pothead with two spliffs?

Double jointed

German Jokes More German Jokes

What does the German President wear?

Leader-hosen.

What did the German baker say to greet his customers?

Gluten tag!

Seuss Jokes More Seuss Jokes

What was Schrodinger's favorite childhood book?

The Cat in the Box by Dr. Seuss

What do you call a magician in a Dr. Seuss book?

Who-dini

4 Year Old Jokes More 4 Year Old Jokes

What's the difference between a 4 year old boy and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

Whats the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4 year old?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window

Jack Jokes More Jack Jokes

Who you must not greet on a plane?

HI Jack!

Where's the best place to buy jive cheese?

Monterey, Jack!