Bar tender
A "casual tea"
BOOOOZE!
At a Mars bar!
What is someone who drinks What hit you in the face last night
Root beer. (tbh: found on a Laffy taffy wrapper)
An aquaholic...
He gets hammered and she gets nailed.
Their Quadratic Formula!
He had a *lovely finish*.
JUST-ICE
He drank so much poison it built his immuni-tea.
It would drink the brandy it would carry and act like a big Gorilla!
Realising the horse is alive and well and how much did I drink last night!
Are there any side effects ' No, it's Can I drink with these '
Copholders
Because he can't reach for the Grey Goose
So that he didn't have to buy a winter coat.
He wanted to have drinks on the house.
A bargain
Nignog
Dilemmanade
Estruckgo I came up with this while drinking French vodka. I am a horrible person when i drink French vodka.
He can't stand the 1%
No-straw-damus! (please be gentle on me as you berate me.)
Pepsi" Is Peps- Uh one moment please In kitchen, to manager I don't know, he just said Pepsi. What do I do
WITH JUST ICE!
Penaltea!
Camel can go days without drinking!
Because Happy Hour ended.
The bartender replies, "For you, neutron, no charge."
Nurse: "I can't tell." Dr: "It's ok; you can tell me. I'm a doctor"
The punch line...
She puts her top back on and leaves.
So they aren't lying when they say they like Java.
He drank all the milk.... makes sense no logically, yes!
You invite two of them.
Me: You just give the bartender your order. Her: ... Me: It's really pretty easy. Her: *leaves*
To get to the other side.
OC Muggs!
The Allahu Ak-Bar.
Mali-BOO
There's no punch line.
An hour later you're hungry for power.
Because only the Sith deal in absolut
Maulbec
It tastes fowl.
Because they only drink Ginger Ale.
Drinking
Buckle get you a drink but not much else!
If you take one, he'll drink all of your beer, If you take 2 neither will drink a drop
Tequila Mockingbird
He was always drinking on the job
You're not a bartender! You're just a pharmacist.
Because if you only bring one, he'll drink all your beer.
They want to have it before it's cool.
Me: I'm moving back in. Mom: Your room is ready. Me: No, your uterus! Mom: Steph you drink too much
Harambe: I'll have a beer Me: No, he'll have just ice Bartender: Just ice Me: Yes. Justice for Harambe.
Chardon-neigh
Barq's Root Beer.
Programmer: I'm only here for the foo.....................d
Straight, No Chaser.
He drank a lot of beer. He ate a lot of beans. *You love it.*
Coala
The milky way!
1%
Me: It'll make u even more energetic than u already are 7: But u drink it all the time& u never have energy!
A cup of Joe.
Because it's not about who you know, but no Yoo-hoo.
TAKBEER!
M: Linda.
Gator-raid. <3 edit: Learned the difference between a crocodile and alligator.
A Mars Bar
Ein stein. - From Big Nate, as told by my kid.
He died in his teepee
Because it's too salty.
The Allahu Ak Bar
Bartender: idk Me: Brrrr-bon lol Bartender: ... Me: jk snowmen don't drink they aren't real
Because they don't like to drink and derive.
Because proper tea is theft.
White Infidel.
Because she was drinking on the job.
Me: You really aren't my kid are you
Drink, Pray, Truck
Hey, where'd my Glascow
Because it takes too long to boil Boston Harbor.
A double Gin
GEORGE GRASHINGTON!
You're just gonna pee it out. This is what Big Water doesn't want you to know.
The Bartender says, "For you No charge."
A tea-shirt.
You've had whey too much!
Because they hate French press!
Fantastic
A place were crows go to get a drink!
He needed the cowlcium.
He liked Ice Cream before it was cool
Lucas refrigerators.
Formula bar
Can I please get a drink
You can't gentrify this place! I just moved here!
Because he went ice-skating before it was cool ()
The landlord said "Sorry we don't serve spirits."
He lifts your spirits.
Ein stein.
Me: Two. 4-year-old: It was nine. Teaching her to count was a mistake.
Because if they had 4 doors they would be called chicken sedans!
Because it was 2 turnt up
A waist of time.
You made the chain too long in the kitchen.
Proper-Tea
Because they did not have proper tea.
About a couple thousand years.
Ohio Satan!
Barns and no-bulls. (This joke was made up by my 7 year-old cousin.)
Because they can only say "neigh!" I wish this was a joke made up by my 7 year old cousin, but she's imaginary.
