The Army.
Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
Coffee Mug
They have to use TWO hands.
One guy threw down his hand and another laughed his head off. This was my best friend's favorite joke when she was little apparently.
He was into lightbulbs before they were cool.
His hands were tied.
A real mess on your hands.
Kermit's undivided
Nail its other hand to the floor.
The octopus. I have no idea what to do with my hands most of the time, and I only have two of them.
Papal towels.
When his hand caught fire!!
Couple's Daily Question Mug
Hint* it starts with P and ends with S. Pens! :D... wait what were YOU THINKING!!!
Someone else's!
It makes it possible for them to go from hole to hole with an iron in their hands.
Happy halloweenie
Everyone needs a little bit of good inside them.
A trillionaire.
One hand on the wheel the other on the road.
God: Uh huge grin cos I'm banging his wife raises hand up top
The French. They always have their hands up.
Not possible. Their hands are too slippery with each other's ejaculate.
It was electric. Also, the car had a set of hands.
The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts.
You get a hand full of sheet. (Joke from my mom)
He went to the second-hand shop.
Every 28 days or so.
Mute
Tie up their hands.
Give them a hand!
A baby with its hand in the power socket.
The NaCls
I poop with both hands.
They've got a lot of thyme on their hands
Me hands her money: When we get to the movies, buy a large popcorn. 10: This is only $2 M: Exactly
Aren't their hands clammy enough as it is...
Me: Seven months A: *Hands me a badge marked "Casual"*
Sometimes an argument of perihelion will get out of hand.
If you're happy and you know it, crap your hands.
A. The remote control slips from his hand.
He was jacking off one day and his hand caught on fire.
Look, Ma! No hands!
So she could moan with the other.
Help, I think I'm in glove".
We do.
Only one. Just as long as you hand him the damn lightbulb.
Because if it were any longer it would be a foot!
Didn't have any hands.. (the real punch line) Knock knock.. Who's there Not Timmy..
I wonder what she thought I was doing with my hands.
A mechanic.
They both hand out long sentences.
Hand me Downs.
Trying to hold on to a thought.
When she hands out long sentences.
They don't want to get their hands dirty.
To catch her false teeth.
GrammysRedCarpet
A Hand!
This is the most violent thing I've ever read.
We both get laid by hand.
My hand.
Because they feed the hand that bites them.
WHOSAGOODGIRRRRLLL Me: *looks around* *slowly raises hand*
Canta Plaus.
The clap.
They say that after you lose your first hand, you get hooked!
Me: A napkin holder K: What's a napkin M: You wipe your hands on it when they're dirty K: You mean like the couch M: ...
Because she stole his heart
A difference of a pinion!
A double decker bus! You looked!
Threw his hands up
A Selfie!
To get to the second-hand shop.
Because he has holes in his hands
Because they fall through his hands.
A really big moth!
I said, "I had to wash my hands so I took it off and placed it on my lover--I mean your mother's kitchen counter."
It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.
One talks with their hands and makes goofy noises at random volumes, and the other can't hear.
Def Leppard, because you can keep on hand on the wheel.
Beer in each hand!
O Cristor Redundant
Try to get her off!
He couldn't keep his hands off his privates
Stick your hand in the bell and play lots of wrong notes.
Pin its other hand to the ground.
Do I hand my life in
Tie their hands behind their back.
So she could moan with the other
Belgium waffles crumble in the hands of German.
Because it doesn't have any hands.
Two octopuses shaking hands.
Stephen Hawking
A microwave.
Because they were handing out guides for the deaf.
Because then it would be a foot
A girl raises her hand and says, "I don't know. I've never been bolted before."
Because he kneeded a poo
When the big hand touches the little hand.
I have to remember to start getting high before bedtime.
The second hand shop.
I want to know her secret
He wanted to feed his nightmares.
The sound you make 10th floor " AHHHHHHHHH " 1st floor " AHHHHHHHHHH "
Coup.
3. Twitter is beautiful. 4. What is life
Because they couldn't find 3 wise men and a virgin.
Dead silence. What's the sound of a one-handed zombie clapping? Undead silence. Thanks to my gaming group for those.
Everyone laughs* NERD: "Nope. It was yours." *Dead silence*
The big hand's touching the little hand.
Neverland Ranch.
When the big hand touches the little one.
