Nail its other hand to the floor.
OC (please use your Ahnold voice) Hasta la vista, Baby....Jesus.
Me: I helped 5: How Me: 5: Me: I read her the instructions
They'd read in the newspaper that one out of every five babies born in the world today is Chinese.
I don't know... I broke the lightbulb after I threw the first one.
Put a toy for babies on its tail. YES
Finding a baby in two trashcans.
A baby falling out of an airplane.
An Infantry
A baby with its hand in the power socket.
Cuz freedom rings, baby!
Because 50% of the taste is in the smell.
It's a baby, not a stash of heroin.
Infantry!
You shake a baby.
Yuri Googoogagarin.
Daughter: You told me to change the baby.
One baby in ten jars How do you got a baby in a container A: blend it.
ME: "Look! Ice cream!" *5 min later* 3YO COVERED IN ICE CREAM: "How do babies get out of be---"
The elephant's!
Me: How ferrets are like if a cat and a scarf had a baby.
Your mom.
You can't unload sand with pitchforks.
Kushie kushie koo
Help! My pocket's been picked!
Me: mmm, talk to me in an accent. H: Zoinks, like, there's a ghost! Let's get out of here Scoob! M: *swoons*
One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other is a watermelon.
Depends how powerful the blender is
I've never heard a baby say: "cigarettes,phone and keys alright let's go"
Asked the teacher hoping that someone would say "babies." She was disappointed when all the children cried out "Happy!"
Mr. Bigger Or Mr. Bigger's baby The baby, because it is a little Bigger.
If you don't like it, you just shake it and start over.
Because they have rubbers on their end.
The baby. It was a little Bigger.
A bus-load of babies on fire.
On the phone. It's a baby. If I wanted to hear random noises when I talk, I have a husband for that.
I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline
Oh, so you're not pregnant '
Babies
What if it's just farting noises Is it graded on a curve
Thanks for the mammaries!
YOU'RE MOM.
Project Manager is a person who believes that 9 women can deliver a baby in one month.
The baby can't carry the mother.
Doverkiin.
You have to love Easter, baby." (OC)
You can't unload bowling balls with a pitchfork.
Stop crying and viper your nose!
WHERE IS MY BABY! Wait, do I have one of those DO I HAVE A BABY!
Because he was a little chili (Actually came up with this while making chili)
For resisting a rest. I'll take my coat
Eric Clapton would NEVER drop a bag of cocaine.
The sandpaper doesn't scream when I rub it's face on wood.
A baby with burst armbands.
Yahoo. There goes my baby.
It had no arms.
Miscarriage. This joke never gets old, just like the baby.
Because Burger King forgot to wrap up his Whopper
The baby and the dad.
Quoted from daughter at age 3) To get food for her babies!
Don't worry baby, I'm sterile.
Pin its other hand to the ground.
They always turn out blurry from him shaking them.
Me: He keeps trying to shove socks thru the mail slot. Wife: Aw. His socks or yours Me: Socks is the neighbor's cat..
I don't know, I lose track of time when I have an erection.
The babies of course, you can use a pitchfork!
5-year-old: A baby. Woman: What kind of baby 5-year-old: A human one. Nailed it.
She didn't take it far enough into the woods.
While holding the baby. I can't believe it was legal for me to reproduce.
You only have to hit the alarm clock once to make it be quiet...
Obi-Gyn Kenobi.
Me, to a baby wearing a Metallica shirt at the grocery store.
Apricots.
Veronica: A lady with a baby in a buggy. Mrs Brown: Tell her to push off.
Because it's the most painful day in their lives
I prefer both of them shaken
Because: he still loves vista,baby!
A baby in the microwave
Baby's because you can use a pitchfork
You take your shoes off before you step on a trampoline Probally heard this but it's worth a shot
Well Mrs Smith said he was a bonny bouncing baby so I wanted to see if he did.
A baby in two dumpsters.
A baby with razorblade. What's red and green and sits in a corner The same baby 3 weeks later.
The baby, because he's a little Bigger.
Because it's a dear little thing.
A cry for Alp!
The babies in my nutsack are still living.
Baby love my baby love....!
He whale-d
The Swallow.
A fedis.
Me: So our pig can't have babies 6: How do you know she doesn't want babies Me:*looks at my kids* Just a hunch
A GIANT! Now what do you call a baby ant an Infant! What do you call an ant thats into business A Merchant! please post more ant jokes if you know of any.
Egyptian dummies.
Paula Ab-doula
I am in bed and thinking about you... And you my dear - I am at a club... And sitting right behind you!!
She wanted to have a baby in 9 minutes.
I cry when I chop an onion.
The rooster clucks defiance.
Mark Spitz and Greg Swallows Yeah, I know it's old....
Because 7 8 9
He never got up by the time he counted to 10 Edit: Phrasing
Kids: WE DO! YAY!
Because all his friends Argon.
Because he's always talking trash.
One kid in three trash cans
The baby grows up and learns to stop crying.
Italians.
A. Betty White.
Pigs want to be pulled through the mudhole.
Mr. Bigger's baby, because he's just a little Bigger.
When you get there, you turn into the driveway. Ba-dum-bum! Don't forget to tip your waitress!
Feeling the doctor's hands on your shoulders.
