A golfer goes "Whack, crap!", and a skydiver goes " Crap, whack!".
Because they're both cauldron
You can tuna piano, but you can't piano tuna.
After 200 years, the Yoghurt develops a culture.
Most complex life forms are a tube within a tube, and the internet is more like a series of tubes.
The knife has a point
There's none, both live for the hits.
About a day
Ask them to say the word 'unionized'.
Only one of them made it to the moon.
With Twitter you only get 140 characters.
I don't know I just fly the drone.
One connects to all your devices & accesses your data, and the other is a hardware standard
The Kindle Fire has a lithium battery.
One bursts into tears. The other bursts out of tears
A sixth sense
I don't have an alcohol collection.
You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
There is no difference. The joke is you just learned math.
The test subject is the only one you'd willingly ask to "tell us about yourself."
Jokes about Batman's parents can get old.
One turns young people into horrible human beings and the other is jail.
Beer nuts are $1.99 deer nuts are under a buck
The color. Yes, this is an anti-joke. Downvote please.
I don't know, I just click "submit"
A cello burns longer.
The vacuum cleaner has the dirtbag on the inside.
Rick Grimes has two I's....
A Golden Retriever can sing better.
One of them is a swift tailor.
Thief: They steal your money then run Politician: They run and then steal your money
A rental car can drive anywhere.
You can't top a good pizza joke.
A Mechanical Engineer makes weapons, a Civil Engineer makes targets.
21st floor person goes: AHHHHHHHHHH 1st floor goes: AHHHHHHHHHH
Snowballs
About eighty years
Nothing, they both have 1 3
Logic
The magician's wand is used for cunning stunts
You can't zucchini bugs! A family-friendly take on the age old "jam VS jelly" joke.
Culture
In the first, you must drink a lot of liquids before battle, but in the latter, you only pretend.
Dead people had lives.
St. Patrick's Day everybody wants to be Irish.
If you leave yoghurt alone for 2000 years it'll develop a culture.
69 cents.
A toddler can count past two...
One is relevant and can get you a job. The other you went to university for.
There is none. All of us hope that the next version will be more stable.
One of them is purple
A building in Dubai.
About 568 horses.
Ever tried swatting a fly with a TV?
You can tuna piano, but you cant piano tuna!
One of it's legs is a little smaller.
Santa stops at three Hos.
At Olive Garden the servers actually work.
Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck
You can tune a guitar but you can't tuna fish.
A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.
Disney Movies still touch kids
One of them makes sense!
You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna
The golfer goes " Damn!" The skydiver goes "Damn! "
I don't know. I hope you're not allowed to take the mail out to the mail box.
One person.
A calendar has a future...
I don't know, I just fly the drone.
Ask them to pronounce unionized.
An egg gets laid.
One's a grand car and the other's a grand car
You don't cry when you cut up a saxophone. Happy Saxophone Day Why this musical abomination deserves its own day is beyond me. Edit: beside to beyond
Well, if you don't know I'm definitely not asking you to mail this letter for me.
If you hit it its fog, if you don't it's mist.
For an European 500 Miles is a long distance, for an American 500 years are a long History
Politicians run BEFORE they steal your money.
Everything. These two objects have nothing in common.
You can say sorry at a funeral.
Students will most likely answer the color) Then you say, "yes, that's one difference but there's another: The White Sox play in Chicago and the Red Sox play in Boston!
One of them you want to see a lot less of.
A tea bag stays longer in a cup.
A teabag stays in the cup longer...
Disney movies can still touch children.
A golfer goes "damn" and a skydiver goes "damn".
Because he wanted to make a difference. My first original, time for open mic!
People in Dubai don't like the Flintstones but people in Abu Dhabi doooooo.
One of them is actually wanted!
Fish are cool
One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other one is a watermelon.
One yanks for the roots, the other roots for the Yanks.
An extroverted physicist looks at shoes when they're talking to you.
Fish muck about in fountains
One builds weapons and the other build targets.
You can tuna piano but you can't tuna fish.
One you'll see in a while, the other you'll see later.
You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna!
Eventually, Marty Mcfly stopped going back to 1985.
They both need to be flipped every 10 mins, but only one turns pink when its done.
Because he was reaching for a galaxy far, far away.
We can see no need for uninstallation and have therefore made no provision for light bulbs to be removed.
A laplander!
He is risen.
She was a roman catholic.
I don't have Ferrari in my garage.
Batvirus (stolen joke xD)
Just two, but how they get in there.. I don't know. (Stolen from an old Maxim in my dad's storage)
Batman can go in a convenience store without Robbin.
Bat man can go a whole night without robin
His significant udder.
Pasta la vista, baby.
Question: What's the difference between Joan of Arc and a canoe? Answer: One is Maid of Orleans and the other is made of wood.
They're all girls on fire.
