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I've always been a fan or dark humor, so, what's the darkest joke you know. no boundaries, no getting offended. please don't downvote anyone because you find it offensive, that's life, get over it.

Where can you find baby dwarfs?

At a dwarfanage

How many surrealist painters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Fish. I got this from bash.org a long time ago, but I can't find the original post, so have this

How do u tell the population of a small native village?

Throw a bunch of pocket change in the middle of town. How do u tell who is the richest person in that village? Find the person who gathered the most change.

How did Jennifer Aniston find her fiancee?

She looked very Theroux-ly.

What can be found in a Judge's freezer?

Just ice.

Where would you find an Egyptian psychopathic swimmer?

In denial.

How do you find a naked man in a nudist colony?

It's not hard.

How do you find a vegan at your dinner party?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

Why couldn't they find the cheesemaker after the accident?

He was trapped under da-Brie!

What did the Mexican boy say to his mom after he mopped the floors and found his brother?

I've cleaned up and found Jesus.

Why was the detective excited when he found a thimble sized crown?

He was looking for Finger Prince. (Say it out loud if you don't get it.)

Why was the girl stuck in the revolving door for two weeks?

Cuz she couldn't find the door handle

Where do you find a one legged cow?

Where ever you left it.

Who's there? Dragon Ball Z. Dragon Ball Z Who?

FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGON BALL Z

How does Sean Connery find his way to the toilet?

With a shat nav.

Where do you find a zebra?

25 letters after a, brah.

What did justin beiber say to his mom?

I FOUND MY MICROSCOPE, now all I need is my lotion and tweezers

What did the farmer say when the police found the gate from the public footpath in his barn and accused him of stealing?

That's not my stile.

What should you do if you find a snake sleeping in your bed?

Sleep in the wardrobe!

Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator?

She couldn't find the 10 key.

When you gonna be famous?

I tell her, 'As soon as they find the bodies.'

Who is that walking up my driveway?

Anxiety in 3...2...1... knock, knock *sigh* "WAIT A SECOND!" *mumbles* "I need to find pants."

Why does the food take so long at an Internet cafe?

Because the servers cannot be found

Why couldn't the blonde manage to make Ice-Cubes?

She couldn't find the recipe.

Why did the University of Oklahoma researcher stay awake every night?

He was trying to find a cure for insomnia.

What did the rapper say when he couldn't find his pants?

Where my knickers at

What do you say when you find two banana peels together?

A pair of slipper

When can you operate?

Lighting a candle* Doctor: When we find you a new liver.

How many Dragonball Z characters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Find out next time, on Dragonball Z!!!

How many blonde's does it take to change a light bulb?

A. 3. 1 to find the bulb 1 to find a ladder and 1 to find a man.

What kind of socks do you find in your backyard?

Garden hose.

What did the scientists say when they found bones on the moon?

The cow didn't make it.

What did the sphinx say?

What did the sphinx say when he found out the pharaoh caught him up in a pyramid scheme Egypt me!

How many Super Saiyans does it take to change a light-bulb?

It's not &gt9000) FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGGGGON BAAAAL ZEEEEEEEEE

How do you find the PC user in the coffee shop?

Follow the power cord.

How can you find the blind guy at a nudist colony?

It's not hard

How do you pick one facial expression for the whole day?

Like what if you find a penny

Where do you go if you want to find a very funny joke?

Apparently, not here

Who will take the second shot in this snooker game?

Find out after the break.

What do you think about the coming battle General?

God knows it will be lost. - Then why should we go for it - To find out who is the loser.

Where can you find some of the world's largest vegetables?

In an American nursing home.

What do you do meet an old friend?

What do you do when someone throws a ball What do you put on a hamburger What do you find in a litter box

How many MP's does it take to change a lightbulb?

Twenty-one. One to change it and twenty to form a fact-finding committee to learn more about how it's done.

What's worse than finding a baby in a trashcan?

Finding a baby in two trashcans.

What kind of a fish do you always find on a beach?

A dead one...

Why do Chinese tourists get disappointed when they visit America?

Because when they buy souvenirs they find out they were made in China.

What do you call an egocentric strain of bacteria found in a Chipotle burrito?

ME-coli

When you wife asked you to buy her car, why did you buy her a diamond instead?

Because I couldn't find a fake car.

What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?

Are you sure it's mine

What should you do if you find a 500-pound dog asleep on your bed?

Sleep on the sofa.

Why was Darth Vader upset when he heard George Michael will only play new songs at his concerts?

He found his lack of Faith disturbing.

What did the paper clip say to the magnet?

I find you very attractive.

What do you do if you find a black mamba in your toilet?

Wait until he's finished.

What do you call it when you're trying to find out what someone had for lunch?

An ingestigation

What was Bernie Sander's favorite topic in mathematics?

Radicals. He loved finding the "root" of problems...

What is green, sings and can be found in the fridge?

Elvis Parsley

What's worse than finding a sack of spider eggs in your room?

Finding a sack of hatched spider eggs in your room

Why do vultures find it easy to fly?

They only ever have carrion baggage.

What's the shortest way to the front page?

Up vote to find out.

Where can you find Jhene Aiko at Bed Peace?

At bed, blunt, and beyond. Bada tssss. I tried.

Where can you find the speed of light?

At C level

What's black and found at the top of a stair case?

Stephen Hawking after a house fire.

What powerful reptile is found in the Sydney opera house?

The Lizard of Oz!

What are your symptoms?

I can't laugh and I can't sing. I'm finding it hard to do anything!

Who says Jesus couldn't perform miracles?

He managed to find mates named Matthew, Mark, Luke and John hanging around in the Middle East.

How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?

You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.

What did water say when it found out hydrogen is a diatomic?

H2 Oh!

What do you call soup that you've found a hair in?

Rabbit Soup

How do you find Ronald McDonald on a naked beach?

His sesame seed buns!

What did Data find in Picard's gym sock?

The Next Generation

Where is the best place to find discounted ray bans?

Gt marked as spam

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