Dark Soles Terrible gaming pun. My friend posted this on FB, thought I would share.
Asking for a friend
Because he was married
Because it won't even give you the time of day.
You got a friend in me.
The vendor asks. "Make me one with everything"
Dino what you're thinking.
Your Sherlock Homie
Because it sticks to itself.
It's not like they had to be there...
Ginger Beard
There's Starbucks next to the headstone.
Boy Hero: I had to do it. He had my skates on.
They both die if you chop them
Czechmate
A friend
Your princi-pal.
He's a fungi
Long time no sea.
Legendairy (credits to my friend Edward Feng for this really dumb pun)
You can't survive in 1000 degrees. *credit to my friend Neriah.
Om lit cred: my friend DaMexicanBurrito from playstation.
Friend: "Motivational."
A homie missile.
Because he found out his friends thought he was a little crabby!
Taking out a provoloan
Carp E.D.M. Credit to my friend for this one.
Asking for a friend..
Where did Es-car-go.
Because he's married.
They like it!
His friends egged him on
No Biggie.
He's good at making friends.
There's not mushroom in here
They branch out
She holds the pan and gets two friends to make the stove shake with fright.
Hard cheese.
He lost it.
Because it has cis-trust issues
When she says she thinks of you like a brother.
You don't let your friends borrow your Lamborghini.
Don't feel blue, Berry, things will get batter
His Holmies
Gangs don't have to pay for friends.
Microwave.
311 Credit goes to my friend Max.
She holds the pan and gets two friends to make the stove shake with fright! 'Owl be seeing you later.'
With Google chromosome+
E=MC U L8R
Greg if you're a friend, Gregory if you were introduced, Mr. Abdalla if you're doing business with one another.
To which his friend replies, "No, it's about four and a half feet."
I'm two tiered. I came up with this at 1am, enjoy.
Because he only had followers. Not friends.
I'll be Bach
He asked. 'Because I only have one friend' the girl replied. 'And I hate her.'
They look in the obituary
They just click you know
Because he only had one pupil! The joke is that I have no friends
A talking frog! Stolen from "Friends" still hilarious.
Brew.
Let us prey.
A lone shark
Because it's this answer to every question you ask them. "Did you hear about the President's new policy on... " "I don't even OWN a TV!"
Watson the menu
Because he plays with pooh.
Because they're both steaming and wet when you enter and they don't mind if you bring friends.
All she does is stay on the dashboard.
Guy: I spy on people. Girl: Really I like to take long walks in the park and go to the movies with my friends. Guy: I know.
Friend: she told me to upload her photo in FB, I uploaded in OLX... Mistakes do happen
It makes no sense, he's not a good driver, he and all his friends are always stuck in second gear
Because his whole life he's Ben Solo
Wonderbread. Anyone want to be my friend
Friends.
Me: Because I'm not paid to be your friend & you say kitchenette.
The poplar ones.
Arnold friend of yours is a friend of mine!
Because he was grounded.
Pawpular!
He was a fungi.
Because he was Snowd en! (according to my friends this joke has been around for awhile, but I hadn't seen it yet, and wanted to share the goof)
You-Rang-a-Tang
Na 'ma ste
Because he was deserted by his friends
Namaste.
IT'S ALL PINK IN THE MIDDLE
Marriage, you wanna?
A Super Saying
The ability to tell a person to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.
Do you know where my son is " "Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you that I'm a necrophiliac."
Have a good one, son.
I'll post the answer tomorrow.
Some idiot forgot to pull it out in time.
A pit bull coming back from the playground.
Neither want me coming inside them.
They both love to spark up joints.
Two - One to put it most of the way in, and one to give it an interesting twist at the end.
The way they pronounce "unionized"
11. 1 to change the lightbulb & 10 to take 200 photos of it & clog my newsfeed.
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