On a scale from Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky, how much do you love kids?
It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.
Making them!!!
Because they have Hollow-Weinies
Unfortunate.
Having to tell your friend his kids should get tested.
Anyone else got some fun jokes your kids have told you?
Kids
While their kids were like, "What's a record
Are you kidding She was the most beautiful woman in the world! Can you imagine what her sons would of looked like
Child custardy
Me: (Smacking the bottom of a ketchup bottle) Fresh Tomatoes...
At whine o'clock.
May the force be with you
Because they contain a lot of fowl language.
Her: I'm making Chinese. Me: Cloning's unethical. Hahaha just kidding. Make me a math tutor.
You planet early.
Are you kidding That's a hardware problem!
A kid who loves halalpenos
WIFE: I just...sobbing...don't want the kids to suffer ME: Eels
He had a lot of aspirations.
Filing taxes... LOLJK... I'm googling "non-extraditable countries". Pack your bags, kid! We're going to Libya!"
Me: I don't have kids. I just heard the teachers here are hot. T: M: How you doin'
Me *turns around and goes back out*
They're too mature for their taste
Because he knows where the naughty girls live. (a kid told me this one)
Gloves. Just kidding, he hasn't opened it yet.
Mom of kid: We don't believe in sugar. Me: I promise it's real. I've seen it with my own eyes.
My neighbour isn't unknowingly raising two of my goats.
Atrophy.
Lucy
You're single with no kids." Me: " Exactly."
Cause North and South Poles repel each other...
Most married couples tried to stay together FOR the kids. Not divorce because of them.
ABCD
Me: Kidding At $6 an apple you should drive them home and make an apple pie for me.
I can barely keep track of my kids and I only have 1 of those. Wait. Two. I have 2 kids.
The matches are made for adults, but kids constantly grab'em and play with them. The situation is quite opposite with breasts.
A trip without kids.
They both give kids a little head.
Simple, I grab them under their arm pits, bend at the knees and stand up, how else would you do it
Fo' Frizzle
Wheeeee!!!! --hey, at least it's a fun joke for kids!
ARE YE READY KIDS!
Wife: They'll get lazy and dependent and never, ever go away. Me: *looks warily at our kids*
Urine trouble
They are both over the counter strike
A rebel without a Claus.
Me too*
I like to reply "I haven't decided yet."
Me: When are you going to stop
A kid.
Yes, I'm not kidding you." he said.
The bus driver stops to let the kids out.
Me: i have no idea what he's for
Bye, son.
Wait for it... wait for it...) brucilage!!!!!!!!
I feel like a kid again
Her kids couldn't see her anymore, she was a trans-parent.
Get in the carrrrrrrrrrrr!
He can't get to 3rd base
A real hootenanny!
The kid is over 5 feet tall.
They're both hoping for nine inches, but will be happy enough with five.
Demanded the officer. "No Officer, it's "Hi, how are you "." replied the kid.
Molest them
Don't talk with someone in your mouth.
Just planning ahead...
4: Trenton said his dad likes to go outside and fight lions - laughs - oh honey - nobody would name their kid Trenton
More kids tripping in lab coats
Kid: "Sorry," I think
Ice cubes.
Gloves. Ha! Just kidding, I don't know what he got, he hasn't opened it yet.
I guess she is trans parent now Edit: *through
A van picks up kids. A minivan picks up your kids
Jose and Hose-B
The first one usually gets screwed up.
You don't know what to say until you wife reply's (idk go ask you dad.) what do you say My little joke
A elevator can raise a kid
DUCK!" How do you get a kid up and running "GOOSE!"
Ask Jozsef Barsi.
They wanted to see it crack up!
Elderly me: I made my kids steak instead of hot dogs. Him: *gasps* You monster.
Matt.
Mumbai
On their fingers
Because 30 is too many!
Q*berty. (my kids wrote this!)
He asked. I said, "they're still together."
Because when they are kids their mothers always tell them: "If you grow up you have to work" *Translated from Italian hope it makes as much sense as there
Three men in a house with dirty dishes in the sink, laundry that needs to be folded and kids that need a bath
Nothing. But he promised he'd make it up to them on the next one.
A migraine
Yellow in the front, brown in the back.
Woman: We wanted to wait until the kids were dead.
Naughty pine
Kid:Don't poop your pants M:I was gonna say "have fun" but...OK.
My son's 10 years... hold on... OFF THE COUCH! brb... convulsing.
New gloves for the cold days
He was a suislide bomber!
To get to the other slide.
MIKE: We'll have a boo Christmas without you.
Mike.
My dentist just pulled one of my teeth out. I don't see much to laugh about in that. But it was the wrong one!
I said "A big knife" She laughed and said "You're funny" I said "wise choice"
I stand corrected." -From
A wind tunnel!
He knows where all the naughty girls live #*()*
YUUUUUUUUUULLLEEE!!!!!!!!!
If you leave yogurt for 200 years it'll grow a culture.
Radioactive elements last longer.
Read all the other threads. I need new content. The old stuff is getting, well old. Here's my contribution. Have you head of the new drinking game? The mike brown special: stand there and take 12 shots. What's the difference between mike brown and a college kid? College kids can handle more shots before they fall down.
Ph.P.
Aye sis
Ahoy M-80
