You can dip a biscuit in your tea but a monster is too big to fit in the cup.
Attire
One has hydraulics the other has high bolics.
They both have wings, except for the elephant.
The green cabs haven't ripened yet.
I don't want to plow my driveway
Leibniz was able to integrate in 1675.
Methodists will make eye contact at the liquor store.
One are Walkers and the others just Lays around.
The start menu.
A STAGE CURTAIN? A: When you pull down the STAGE CURTAIN, the show is over, but when you pull down the UNDERWEAR..... it's SHOWTIME!!!
One is cos(o), the other is Kosovo
The electrician knows where the ground is.
One costs an arm and a leg. The other caused alarm and an egg.
Snow White had the excuse of being asleep when she let seven in.
You can helicopter your banana but you can't banana your helicopter
Ones green and the other is black
I've never paid to have a lentil on me!
A student repsonds, "3 boys + 1 girl = problem. 1 boy + 3 girls = challenge."
An egg gets laid
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
Ans: Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR & Private secretary says ITS MORNING SIR
People sometimes get upset if you shoot a duck. The duck is much less greasy. BUT MOST IMPORTANT Nobody ever complains about a duck's bill.
A good friend will help you move house A really good friend will help you move a body!
You can't ride your bike on a sociopath
Santa would never free an elf.
No fee--If No Recovery!
One's wanted.
I've never smeared tigger on my face
You only have to punch information into a computer once.
Being cupped is far more pleasurable than being mugged
OC) You really can't tell the difference between a fish and an elephant
6 inches is medium 8 inches is rare.
Larry Hogan gets back from the hospital.
We don't need an asteroid...
The washer doesn't follow you around after you put a load in it.
About 3 replies in the top comment thread.
The podiatrist bucks up your feet.
A magicians wand is used for cunning stuns.
About 10 pounds.
Nothing.
Unlike football, you'll never get to spike it in the Friendzone.
A battery has a positive side.
Oscar winners can thank BOTH of their parents.
In professional wrestling they know what they are doing.
After 200 years the yogurt would have developed some kind of culture.
I've never had a Walnut on my chest..
And the dad says: 'Wealth is caviar, champagne and women. Poverty is hot pocket, beer and your mother!'
Nicki Minaj never owned slaves.(https://www.youtube.com/watch v=Gr1p4KtgOXc)
My wife actually looks forward to riding the motorcycle.
One of them ruins your life. The other's just meth.
One is a hunt on a course.
One is piracy and the other is CONSpiracy
Paul Walker wouldn't be seen dead in a Skoda.
None. Eventually, both of them are gonna crash.
You will see one later and one in a while.
About 5000 miles.
Nothing
Eggs actually get laid.
A voice.
The second letter.
10 lbs of pressure on the back of the head.
Tyrone
I asked for Pizza #KingOfjokes
A genie grants wishes, while a genius wishes for grants.
A knife has a point.
Apart from the Spelling?
The Mercedes can easily reach 40.
When you twist the doorknob it doesn't scream.
Question: What's the difference between Joan of Arc and a canoe? Answer: One is Maid of Orleans and the other is made of wood.
The bond matures.
Ever tried dipping a sailor in a boiled egg?
I don't want to put a repost in my mouth
Ted can swim away from an accident.
Beer nuts are a dollar twenty five, deer nuts are under a buck
A circus has a cunning array of stunts
The dentist pulls it out when it hurts.
About 5 inches.
A woman wants a man who can satisfy all her needs. A man wants all women who can satisfy his needs.
Snowballs
About a day.
Bricks get laid.
One plays with an electric guitar, the other a-cue-stick.
One turns young people into horrible human beings and the other is jail.
A gambler might lose.
I've never paid $200 to have a kidney bean in my mouth.
I don't know, I just click "submit"
One of them is a swift tailor.
Nothing, they both have 1 3
My YouTube experience lasts longer than 10 seconds.
Inserting a rod into the reactor turns it off.
One's organized.
The golfer goes " Damn!" The skydiver goes "Damn! "
Haw
An egg gets laid before it cracks.
Dead animals have skid marks AROUND them
One has a job.
A puppy eventually grows up and stops whining. Thanks to PuddinHead742 for this one.
A sock takes five toes and a camera takes photos.
Because it needs some bragging rights.
To stop it from falling out.
It's a touchy subject.
Warden at juvenile detention center.
Maid in China.
Marriage, you wanna?
A Feyonce
In the NB - "eh"
A centimeter-alada
Psychic: That shirt is too small. Employee: You didn't even try it on. Psychic: I'm a medium.
His shirts get all winkly.
Easy. Lock them both in a trunk and watch who will be happier to see you after you open it in 15 minutes.
SEVEN.
I don't have Ferrari in my garage.
A quarter pounder with cheese.