2 large planes
Because it was 2 turnt up
2 Na
Because with only 2 nuts, one sausage, and a little bit of milk, they can fill a woman's stomach for 9 months.
He thought they were a delivery service
2: 'Well, I think I can really push my limits' 1: 'Oh right, are you sure ' 2: 'I'm definite'.
Half a cat
Hello, how am I " "You're fine, how am I "
You're an odd fellow
1. Spelling 2. Pronunciation
HeHe
Why not 17 What's stopping us
They only need 2 eggs n 1 sausage to keep a girl full for 9 months
Lean beef. bonus: What do you call cows with no legs Ground beef.
Twenty. 1 to hold the bulb 2 to turn the ladder and 17 to be on the guest list.
When it has metaphor.
A match maiden heaven
I've trapped it in my bedroom, send help...
2. What do you call his first victim 3. What do you call his second victim 1. Bernie 2. Crispin 3. Ash
4. Prophet.
Ewe 2
1, 2, 3, 95, 98, ME, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.
Did you say angel WRONG! Its a Chinese phone. *Wing Wing* "Halo "
The Tchernobyl cowboy.
Ok you 2 dont start anything
Only 2, but I have no idea how you're gonna fit both of them inside a lightbulb.
Fred and George Weasley.
Because somebody divided 14 into 2 and he was the prime suspect
Pupil: 4 Teacher: That's good. Pupil: Good that's perfect!
2-Gainz
A senior high school math problem.
A No. 2 pencil.
They only had 2 trucks
1 CCCP, 2 CCCP, 3 CCCP... Iwillseemyselfout
Because they really wanted a third's eye view!
Basic Math
It was 2 tired...
2
Because if it had 4 it would be a chicken sedan
2 Tightends & a Wide Reciever
Because if it had 4 doors, it would be a chicken Sedan.
One for 2008 and one for 2016.
1 cup of root beer, 2 scoops of ghoul.
1) Get away or I'll call the police!!! 2) I love you and want to marry you and have your children.
200 ft: Aaaaaaaaa, bump 2 ft: Bump, aaaaaaaaa (Yes, it's an old, really old joke. Surprisingly haven't seen it here, yet.)
Because if you add even one more it gets "2 farty".
Because there is a lot of weighting. *sorry. i woke up at 2 am with this in my head.
I can tell after like 2 questions if its a wolf or my nana
2.Knock Knock 1.She didn't have any arms!! 2. Who's there NOT SARA!!
Because there's only 2 factors involved.
Boy: My wife & 2 kids.
Trilingual. What do you call a person who knows 2 languages Bilingual. What do you call a person who knows only one language American.
2. How do you resuscitate a drunk cat 3. Will they do an autopsy on a dead cat
2 gals 1 cup(http://www.reddit.com/r/Canning/comments/yyhsp/my20triptothelocallatinmarketnetted165/)
Hose A and hose B (read it out loud)
If you take one, he'll drink all of your beer, If you take 2 neither will drink a drop
The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
Because if they had 4 doors they would be chicken sedans.
1. Minimum wage 2. Police reform 3. Why are there raisins in this, Louise
In case you get a hole in one.
2) How 2 build ark 3) Can god just build ark 4) Are snakes necessary 5) Is god real or am I high
Me: I dunno. Let me check *pulls out phone Me: Not good. It only got 2 likes on Instagram Waiter: ...
8 fingers and 2 Thu"ums... Unless the dragonborn only has a Haafingar
No1: Don't tell everything you know.
The twenty second ones and the thirty second ones
1. wets toothbrush 2. puts toothpaste on toothbrush 3. wets toothbrush again 4. does backflip on to huge pile of money
She saw 2 and 3 halving six
Their patients are 2'
A ginger kid has 2 friends!
Kurt and Rod.
Person 2: A log cabin! Person 1: No, a houseboat. You forgot to add the C!!
Miraculous. Edited: tough crowd
Because its natural log is 1.
They ordered 2 pepperoni pizzas, but all they got were 2 large plains.
If it had 4 doors, it'd be a chicken sedan.
It's not right.
An elephant with diarrhea
Because in charge of scheduling, Yoda was.
Because in charge of directing, Yoda was
An elephant with diarrhea...
Because he was a cheetah and because he was lion too much to her.
2...and don't ask me how they got in there. (My 87 year old grandma just told me this one)
1. Have a date. 2. Try not to forget it.
Jose and Hose B
Because they cantaloupe. (The wife thought of this one... hopefully nobody else has posted it)
It was a No. 2.
Witch 2: "I get a lot of hexercise."
Your ex!
A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about.2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together.
Only two, but you've got to wonder how they climbed up there!
1 or 2? 1... or 2?
I wub you
Deja Moo!
Halfway.
To stop getting wet!
Brian's... Briiiiiiiiian's!!!
Brian: A real turkey. I could hardly sit through it the second time!
They'll tell you! (Source: am an engineer)
His personality!
The Apostrosea.
Shhhhhhh.
In the summer there is a tax deductible convention in Hawaii dealing exactly with this issue.
Person 1: Suggest me a good phone to buy nowadays. Person 2: Microsoft Lumia 950 XL is good for winters, will keep you warm. Very warm. Person 1: So what about summers then? Person 2: Same, it freezes often as well
It is always an insecure line!
Miss ewe!
He went on furlong-er.
The Caliph ate.
