Come Jokes

The over easy egg because it was really runny. How about second The over medium egg because it was only a little runny. And last That would be the baked egg.

What does Michael Jackson have in common with a second place racehorse?

They both came in a little behind.

Why did the momma pepper tuck in her baby?

Because he was a little chili (Actually came up with this while making chili)

When you're away on a business trip, do you think about me?

Apparently "Only to stop myself from coming too quickly" wasn't the right answer.

How is a man like a snowstorm?

You never know when he's coming how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

Why didn't Silento knock before coming inside?

Because you already know who it's isss! My little sister told me this joke.

Why is a dog like a baseball player?

He runs for home when he sees the catcher coming.

Who came first, the chicken or the egg?

They came together, it was a perfect lay.

What do you say when someone dies while getting an erection?

He came and went at the same time.

What's wrong with them?

His boss asks. "I just can't see myself coming to work today."

Why are you studying your Easter candy?

I'm trying to decide which came first-the chocolate chicken or the chocolate egg!

What do you call a beach with crooked waves?

OC A Scoli-ocean! (Came up with that recently, hope it tickles your funny bone)

What part of the body did the chiropractor fix when Eminem came in?

Shady's back*

What did the premature ejaculatist say to his offended lover?

Sorry... That came out wrong.

What is a moo hoo for steak that came late?

Filet delay!

What do colorblind people say to the unexpected?

Well that came out of the purple

What do you call a French human delicacy?

Estruckgo I came up with this while drinking French vodka. I am a horrible person when i drink French vodka.

What is the difference between an abusive relationship and The Chainsmokers?

Nothing, The hits keep coming

What's the difference between Julius Caesar and Genghis Khan?

Caesar: "I came, I saw, I conquered." Khan: "I conquered, I saw, I came."

Why was the boy unhappy to win the prize for the best costume at the Halloween party?

Because he just came to pick up his little sister.

What do women and police cars have in common?

They both make a lot of noise to let you know they are coming.

Why didnt the Asian block a punch coming to his face?

He couldn't see it coming

What do you call Captain Forte and his sidekick Piano?

A dynamic duo! This joke came to me in my delirious state after hours of band camp practices.

What is this world coming to?

Do their parents know they are outside, interacting, and getting exercise

How do you see that a linedancer came from Belgium and not from the Netherlands?

He wears the cardboard box on his boots.

Who's there! Army Ant! Army Ant who?

Army Ants coming for tea then

Why do women love Jordan Spieth?

Because he came second.

Where's the best place for a horse to grow up?

In a stable environment. Sorry I'm high and it just came to me.

Why are you running like that?

He answered, "Because you're coming home early."

What is the witches motto?

We came we saw we conjured!

What's the difference between this morning and your wife?

I'm not coming in *this morning*

What do the racehorse that finished in second and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both came in a little behind.

What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something.

What came in the mail today?

Anthrax.

What do you give an alligator who is having trouble hearing?

A gator-aid. Bet you did see that one coming:P

You might also enjoy:

Church Jokes More Church Jokes