The man, he should't have been driving in the kitchen.;3
It was a bright sunny day.
Because it's the reason for the sneason.
Eclipse it
3/5
1. No mind. 2. No business.
What's kraken JAJAJAJAJJAJJAJA
Flop.
Because he wanted a hot rod.
The clerk said "Just a minute..." "Thank you" the man said and hung up.
He was a thief
Eclipse it.
Men behaving Baghdadly.
A. Three if you slice them very thinly.
A miso-genie!
With a crowbar.
You weren't there man
A man that states the obvious
You don't - they're born that way.
He ran out of balance
One man threw a cigarette overboard and the boat became a cigarette lighter.
A man outstanding in his field.
Because with only 2 nuts, one sausage, and a little bit of milk, they can fill a woman's stomach for 9 months.
Sneak up behind him and start throwing rice.
Even then men wouldn't ask for directions!
Because their wives are driving.
Jerky.
Because they were a nuisance (new cents).
They are both X-Men
They are both empty from the neck up.
He got off on a technicality
Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
Maternity leave would last for two years with full pay and morning sickness would rank as the nation's #1 health problem.
Are you 0K
Because he's a man of the nice watch
Around.
To avoid criticism and comparison.
It's easy, he's all left foot - just constantly show him down the right side and don't let him cut in.
Because his mixtape was to die for...
Because he knows it's all over as soon as she opens her mouth.
This is the plot of Edward Sizzlerhands
He gives it a valenshine!
He took a can of orange juice from the freezer and made a pitcher.
E.T. phoned home.
A Lot.
Sorry about your reptile dysfunction.
Art.
He wanted to see time fly!
A hog doesn't have to sit in a bar and buy drinks all night just so he can f*** some pig.
Dad: A man is who loves unconditionally, cares about you and protects you. Kid: When i grow up, I'll be a man like mom
Well, there is a vast difference.
He just beetled off!
Russel.
Anything you want, He can't hear you!
The man looks at her and says "I just moved the potatoes."
Attire.
So men can remember them.
He wanted stable employment
50: 3 to die trying, 1 to actually pull it off, and 46 other to say, "man, I could do that!"
Raise the urinals
He snooker in!
Well it's the first thing they say when I approach them.
('He wanted cold hard cash!')
They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.
Gifted.
No woman wears the same attire every year.
Cosmetics is a woman's means for keeping a man from reading between the lines.
Get married on his birthday.
Do you mind getting out of my son.
Oh, so it has its ups and downs.
He'll probably catch fleas
He was in charge of refresh mints.
Cause he had to take him out for a drag every night.
His senentences start with "A woman once told me.."
They only need 2 eggs n 1 sausage to keep a girl full for 9 months
God: *sigh* Fine. Mouths. But they'll talk. A lot.
Credit to Bo Burnham.
To get some fresh air
Because it was pay-per view.* "paper view"
Lawyer says: "1000 US dollars for 3 questions." Man: "Wow - so much! Isn't it a bit expensive " Lawyer: "Yes, what is your third question "
Ubisoft
In real life, men aren't affectionate out of bed.
Tony
Matt
Make him wear shoes.
Any place without a drive-up window.
Antibiotics
2. What do you call his first victim 3. What do you call his second victim 1. Bernie 2. Crispin 3. Ash
That can can can-can!
He was Snowden.
A tangent
So weird having men walk around in suits and half ties.
Drunk responses* This one's for you *turns off music, serious tone* This is a bad place to meet men
In Wales.
Because he wanted to drink two beers with his lunch.
He couldn't see that well
On a piece rate.
None, he fell.
Willis.
A pizza can feed a family.
Your bike.
My supply was short.
Google Fiber Note: Randomly came up with this joke today
It gets put under cardiac arrest.
A polterheist.
Friend: she told me to upload her photo in FB, I uploaded in OLX... Mistakes do happen
FB=Whats on your mind FourSquare= Where am I Quora=what Youtube=What Im watching. LinkedIn=Whats in it for me
The yellow man lives in the yellow house. The purple man lives in the purple house. The red man in the red house. And the blue man in the blue house. So who lives in the White House? The black man. It's better in person, I'm so sorry.
When I fall in love it will be for heifer.
Nothing, as long as she doesn't drop my beers
An argument with a woman! And I'm in one right now.
Rich... Also an ambulance.
A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need...A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
I feel like crap inside because obviously my order didn't satisfy her.
