The hypocrite's the one that exists.
He's outstanding in his field
Don't worry, he'll tell you.
Because 7, 10, 11!
If it's bill withers!
He doesn't need to tell him to shake the martini.
During any conversation he's looking at YOUR shoes.
Give them a test-tickle
Because they always take things literally
Nothing. She's already been told.
Everything you say goes in one ear and out the udder!
He's staring at your shoes instead of his own.
Because if they are they'll tell you, and if they aren't you don't want to insult them.
Both are yelling at the same kid.
Nothing, because he is the one who knocks.
Don't worry, they'll tell you.
One is white and stinks, and the other is cheese. (As told to me by the UPS guy)
Just wait, they'll tell you.
It's gone.
Because her teacher told her to go do an essay.
Because freedom rings
I'm bad under pressure!! It's the lamest car joke in the world.
His matey told him he needed an iPatch
Because it was too cheesy. I work at a hot dog stand and tell this from time to time.
We need to give you a cavity search
Don't worry, they'll tell you
On account of the coffin.
Cacawatches
It's feeling down.
A punkin. Edit: and apparently not me.
Because the stalks are all ears.
Only one of them is organized. Couldn't help but post this. Went to see a former mafia boss today, and that joke was told leading up to him speaking.
Because the pee is silent.
Because they're too cornea.
They will tell you.
Gopher gold.
Nothing, she's already been told twice.
Because he told everyone to march fourth.
Is it mine"?
I'll show myself out.
Their teacher told them not to use tables!
Nitrogen Monoxide
Yes but we cantaloupe.
They wear mittens.
A school teacher tells you to spit out your gum, a train says choo choo.
Namaste
Elephant snot. Funniest part is seeing people's reaction when you tell it.
His mouth is moving.
The sky's the limit for you".
Wooden shoe like me to tell you.
Nothing, you've already told her.
I herd.
Hop in
Just ask them to read this word: unionized.
If you answered "I don't know." I would like to tell you that I spent all day cleaning that mess up.
I still love vista, baby
Don't worry, he'll tell you
Because if it were invented anywhere else, it'd be called a teethbrush.
Just wait and they'll tell you.
Stand in the middle of the street. If someone yells, "hey, get out of the street" you're in the US. If they yell, "get out of the street, eh" you're in Canada
When was the last time you saw a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field?
Not enough minerals.
Leave my provolone!
By the "M" on his pajamas.
The punchline is too long.
Apricots. I used to love this joke when I was a little kid and told it over and over. I'm still a little in love with it for that reason. What are some of your favorite jokes from when you were a little kid?
Nah, I'm a stay. (namaste)
The drummer is drooling out of sides of his mouth.
This one will sleigh you!
They look at your feet instead of theirs.
Because opposites attract. (Told to me by 2 students today, loved it!)
Because HE is the one who knocks.
I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people......
Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I told them nothing.
You give her a shovel and tell her to get to work.
The naval officer is trying to feed bread to the helicopters!
He was looking for Pooh. - *My little brother told me this one hit me with a little bit of nostalgia.*
An old person can sing and brush their teeth at the same time.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the results are a bit grizzly.
Namaste.
With a witchwatch.
They'll tell you.
A skunk uses a cheaper deodorant!
She thought children should be seen and not herded!
Because his good friend Nostradamus told him he would.
Namaste (pronounced:nah I'ma stay)
Because they won't believe it.
When talking to you, the extrovert mathematician looks at *your* shoes.
Don't worry, someone will tell you.
Worst. Spy. Ever.
Too Bad, I'm not telling you!
Put an apple on your head & stand still he'll Tell you.
He left his head and shoulders on the beach.
Ask them to say the word, "unionized".
Because he fainted.
He has claw marks on his forehead.
Tall stories!
5-year-old: It's only for people who don't have lawyers.
We may never know the truth.
They're all girls on fire.
Broadview*
Look ma, no hands!
Use the fork, Luke.
Because it was too froggy outside.
To prove they can focus on two things at once.
Two test tickles
They won't ever hit anything.
The number of the car that hit him.
They vote
Lmao Zedong
Give her a shovel.
Can we just bury this?
